healed

Jesus turned and saw her, "Take heart, daughter," he said, "your faith has healded you." And the woman was healed from that moment."  Matthew 9:22

 So the saying is time heals all wounds.  I guess that means about how long it takes an individual to come to Christ possably.  What about for a person who has been following Christ for a long time?  I feel I have some deep wounds that have hurt my heart stings.  Things that I can talk about that burn a little and somethings I'd rather not talk about that just make me misserable.  I should be able to get over anything. This is about when a woman touched Jesus's cloak to be healed from 12 years of bleeding.  Her faith knew the slightest thouch would heal her.  I have moments when I take to myself and the Lord and he knows my wounds and how I'd like them handled.  He has His way of making things go that I am not in control of and I need to let go of what I want to control.  I guess I can be more of a control freak than I realise.
  My son's Grandma for instance always wants to interupt me and take everything I say with a negative attitude. I had her come in one day for counceling and let her get things off her chest.  She still wont listen to me.  I know I can be rude to her too but I try to say what is on my mind that I feel is best for Caleb.  If she would just listen that could make all the difference.  I do not feel comfortable being around Jason nor Sue.  They do not treat me properly.  If Sue would just stop taking everything I say with a negative attitude then I could stop hurting.  Maybe that isn't how God wants it to go for now.  There are certain things we don't see the same between Sue and myself.  She is probably always going to stand up for Jason's side.
  In the end the best way for me is to let it go.  That is the hardest thing to do cause I am a fighter.  I am small but I can put my foot down through the tears that come.  Everyone has their hurts.  No one is perfect.  I know I am certaintly not perfect.  Maybe right now the best thing for me to do is surround myself with those that truly care and truly will listen.  I doubt anyone reads these for now so I put it out there.  But in case anyone does there is so much to this situation that not many know about.
   I know my mom would have made an awesome grandmother.  Sometimes I wonder how much more I can take but for now I will keep on fighting.  Not fighting the Sue thing just life in general.  For now I just keep praying and trusting God to make sense of all this madness.  Who knows, maybe it is a blessing in disguise.  God must think I'm stronger than I do to put me through all this mess.  At least Caleb is healthy!!
  I was snuggling earlyer with a sleepy Star, Josie and Caleb and felt so blessed God gave them to me to take care of.  I hope I getto see my son grow up in to a man and graduate high school and all that and more!!

-Wendy